humor
Jul 02 '09
Linguistic Gymnastics Entertain Infopark Diners
An unidentified Internet user snapped this spectacular example of culinary incompetence in the canteen of Budapest's cutting-edge Infopark office complex - and boy it's a good one. By way of explanation, the Hungarian says "horseradish" ("torma") and not "gymnastics"...
Oct 09 '08
Lost in Translation (II): I Said Watch the Menu's English "Like a Hawk," Dummy!
Via the félrefordítások ("mistranslations") blog we get this snapshot of a menu featuring a dish described in English as "Roasted seafish fillet with freid (sic) potatoes in hawk." But what may seem like the mother of all menu translations...
Oct 09 '08
Lost in Translation (I): Something Doesn't Smell Right With This
At least three reasons you have to love the above mistranslation of rántott sertésszelet. One, it seems to have involved several different foul-ups: rántott (fried) being mistaken for the verb "to pull," and szelet ("slice") getting messed up with...
May 09 '08
The Perfect End to a Delicious Meal of Chicken Catastrophe and Mackerel Debacle
For a sense of what this is all about, click here. And for a sense of what it may taste like, click here....
Apr 15 '08
The World Gags on Hungarian Flavors
Over the past couple of weeks, we've received not one but two emails pointing us to spoof advertisements for non-existent products featuring traditional Hungarian flavors. The first (above) features a range of condoms flavored with such typically Magyar ízek...
Mar 05 '08
Frogs Live, Oranges Die, as Chow Hits Hungarian Highways for Second Week
Remember that freak story last week about the traffic accident near Szeged that claimed the lives of 100+ pigs? Well, it turns out it wasn't a freak, because over the last several days there have been two similar stories...
Feb 26 '08
Survivors of Miskolc Pig Massacre Meet Untimely End on Highway Near Szeged
You know that horrible story about the person who misses a plane which then goes on to crash, only to get in a fatal car accident on the way home from the airport? Well, never mind, because we have...
Feb 19 '08
An Exceptional Offer for the Ex-Fat Expat!
So we were over at the expatriate-heavy FirstMed medical center in Buda a few weeks back (don't ask) when we happened on the above two flyers - one for the clinic's weight-reduction program, and one for a special "two...
Jan 07 '08
Holiday Cheer (II): New Year's No Party for Hungarian Pigs
As seen around noon on December 31, at Budapest's Nagyvásárcsarnok (Central Market Hall). And you thought the end of the long holiday break made you feel gutted......
Jan 07 '08
Holiday Cheer (I): This Soup Has No Balls
Via Pestiside.hu reader P.M. we get the above pic of a rather unappetizing menu offering, taken at the historic Hunguest Hotel Palota out in scenic Lillafüred. ("Quite an interesting 'inter'-course offered by the cook along with the traditional halászlé,"...
Nov 19 '07
Lack of Options Facilitates Quick Decision Making
Sometimes you'll go to a restaurant and be overwhelmed by the choices. That cannot be said for the location above, the menu for which we found via humor portal Legalja.hu. As the menu makes it oh so clear, you...
Sep 19 '07
Peach Drink Packaging Reveals Product To Be... Not Very Good
There are at least two reasons to suspect that this peach drink being marketed in Hungary is - if you'll pardon us - pretty shitty. First, the 1% of it that consists of actual fruit juice is apple, grape...
Aug 28 '07
Study Underscores Hungarians' Unusual Taste in Pasta
Hungarian "consumer protection" magazine Kosár ("shopping cart") recently published the results of an interesting test comparing some of the various brands of pasta commonly available on the shelves of domestic retailers. According to a summary of the finding on marketinginfo.hu,...
Aug 24 '07
Poultry Processor Chickens Out After Tasteless Ad Bombs
Executives of a Hungarian poultry processor and their public relations advisors have been busy this week dealing with the fallout of an ad campaign that is tasteless even by the country's pretty loose standards. According to portal hirszerzo.hu, Zala...
Aug 16 '07
Court of Grape Fairy to Host Racy Christian Wine Blessing Also for Little Childrens Near to Historic Pesti Zoopark
We try to make a habit of not spoofing the often (unintentionally) hilarious English translations that regularly appear on food and wine-related Hungarian websites. But since the Budapest Tourism Office has probably eaten a million forints of our hard-earned...
Jul 30 '07
Hungarian Farmers Turn to Hairdressers to Ward Off Animals
Farmers in the eastern Hungarian town of Vámospércs, have discovered a novel way of protecting their fields from animals - the sweaty, cigarette-smoke-filled hair of local humans, reports hirszerzo.hu. They learned the trick from a beekeeper who observed that animals...
Jul 09 '07
THIS IS AN EX-FISH!
The details of the fish in the photograph were not given in the e-mail sent to us by Sz.F., but we can confirm with some certainty that they were not the "elő ponty" (living carp) advertised. In the words...
May 30 '07
Pro-smoke Lobby Chokes in Own Propaganda
Despite the idea of banning smoking in public, and restaurants in particular, rapidly gaining acceptance around Europe (even in among the puffers of Italy) Hungarians remain deeply sceptical of any measures that may improve their quality of life, and their...
Apr 24 '07
Hungarian Food Retailers in Pioneering Discount Pricing Program
We have a few serious - and no-so-serious - posts on the way. But first just enjoy these two shots that ended up in our E-mail inbox via Hungarian gagsite legalja.hu. We're sure they are innocent mistakes. Or at...
Apr 18 '07
How to Discipline a Bad Hungarian Chef Without the Unpleasant Jail Time
As you may have heard, a 52-year-old man from Tárnok burst into Hungarian culinary history on Sunday after he shot the chef of a District XXII restaurant in the eye because he didn't like his meal. This being Hungary, the...
Feb 26 '07
And Don't Forget to Try the Hot Road Apple Pie
The above little chestnut just appeared in our in-box. While it's entitled "Romania in the EU" and was no meant to show how poor and primitive our eastern neighbor is, we're posting it anyway, because a) we're not 100%...
Nov 17 '06
Culinary Traitor Stalks Hungarian Prime Minister's Kitchen
When a dignitary from one country entertains a fellow dignitary from another country at his residence, several age-old customs are usually recognized. First, the mood and conversation is expected to be polite but businesslike. Second, the dress is expected to...
Nov 15 '06
There's No Hiding From Don Pepe, He Will Find You
If you live in a hard-to-find place in Budapest and have trouble getting food delivered, here's a tip: Don Pepe. Just consider the above pic, which got to us via reader M.B., and which shows a receipt for a...
Nov 14 '06
Suddenly We're Not Feeling So... Peckerish
Spotted on the lunch special board today at Menza by trusty eater/reader S.D. It's a little out of focus because he took it with a phone camera, or because his hands were shaking. Best of all, we're almost 100%...
Nov 07 '06
Space Pörkölt Popular With Russian Cosmonauts
Each one of Russia's satellites had an important role to play in the space race, and Hungary was no exception. And because every Magyar wife and mother knows the importance of sending their menfolk on their way with a lavish...
Nov 06 '06
Favorite Hungarian Snack Revealed as Potential Terrorist Weapon
So if you're flying out of Budapest's Ferihegy airport be aware that, starting from today, certain new restrictions are being applied to what you can carry on board departing aircraft. Following the lead of other airports, Ferihegy is putting in...
Oct 11 '06
Subversive Foreign Food Influences Seen at Nationalist Demonstration
As snapped by contributor Matt Ellis at a recent gathering in Budapest of right-wing anti-government demonstrators, many of whom are convinced that the United States is unfairly supporting the hated Socialists currently running Hungary - and who never miss...
Oct 10 '06
Retro Rice Shortage Special at Tesco
Although there has been some misguided reminiscing recently about the good old days, no one, especially not us gourmands, is fondly remembering the dark days when hungry citizens had to stand in line for hours to get their hands on...
Oct 02 '06
Serious Reservations About Native American-Themed Teahouse
In case you hadn't noticed, there's a tea war brewing in Budapest, and Jókai utca is the front line, with no fewer than five teahouses on the relatively short street that runs from Andrássy to Nyugati tér. One of...
Sep 28 '06
Budapest's Newest Restaurant Closes Amid Political Infighting
Restaurants in Budapest have a way of quickly closing amid murky circumstances, but one such closure just being reported by the local media must take the cake. According to the wires, sometime around lunch today the health authorities arrived at...
Sep 22 '06
It Was an Itsy-bitsy Teeny-Weenie Spicy Hungo Pepper Peenie
Sent in by reader M.B. Given all the megatons of peppers grown in Hungary it's not surprising that one would look like a you-know-what, assuming these actually popped up locally. But that one person could have picked a whole...
Sep 19 '06
Two Great Food Sins that Taste Great Together
While around the word, animal rights activists are doing their best to ban foie gras, and never miss a chance to guilt people for eating veal, they aren't making much headway in Hungary. Or at least not at Kiskakukk...
Sep 19 '06
And the Lard they Browned the Onions in Came via Pipeline
Sent our way by Sz.F. We always knew Bogrács Gulyás (kettle-cooked goulash) can be a heavy dish, but this seems to be taking things a bit far....
Sep 15 '06
A Degree in Nutrition and Ancient Amharic Would Also Be a Plus...
Finding staffers with the appropriate skills can be a struggle for even the most ordinary sorts of restaurants. But for eateries with more specialized needs it can be murder. Just consider the following help wanted notice recently posted in the...
